The Wisdom of Doctor Dodypoll

From the First Quarto edition of 1600
Original Spelling. Edited by B.F. copyright © 2002, all rights reserved
Spelling in speech designations has been standardized.
Items defined in the glossary are underlined.
Run on lines (closing open endings) are indicated by ~~~.

Act 3


Scene III.1
[Enter Flores, Cassimeere, Lassinbergh, Lucilia, Cornelia, Haunce & Doctor.]

HAUNCE: Well mistr. god give you more joy of your husband
Then your husband has of you.

DOCTOR: Fie, too too bad by my fait, vat, my Lord
melancholie, and ha de sweete Bride, de faire Bride, de verie
fine Bride, o monsieur, one, two, tree, voure, vive, with
de brave capra, heigh.

HAUNCE: O the Doctor would make a fine frisking
Usher in a dauncing-schoole.

DOCTOR: O by garr, you must daunce de brave galliarr,
A pox of dis melancholie. ... [III.1.10]

CASSIMERE: My Lord, your humors are most strange to us,
The humble fortune of a servants life,
Should in your carelesse estate so much displease.

LASSIN: Quod licet ingratum est, quod non licet acrius urit.

FLORES: Could my child's beautie, moove you so my lord,
When Lawe and dutie held it in restraint,
And now (they both allowe it) be neglected?

LASSIN: I cannot relish joyes that are enforst,
For, were I shut in Paradice it selfe,
I should as from a prison strive t'escape. ... [III.1.20]

LUCILIA: Haplesse Lucia, worst in her best estate.

LASSIN: Ile seeke me out some unfrequented place,
Free from these importunities of love,
And onelie love what mine owne fancie likes.

LUCILIA: O staie my Lord.

FLORES: What meanes Earle Lassinbergh?

CASSIMERE: Sweete Earle be kinder.

LASSIN: Let me go I pray.

DOCTOR: Vat you go leave a de Bride, tis no point good
fashion; you must stay be garr. ... [III.1.30]

LASSIN: Must I stay sir?

DOCTOR: I spit your nose and yet it is no violence, I will
give a de prove a dee good reason, reguard, Monsieur,
you no point eate a de meate to daie, you be de empty,
be gar you be emptie, you be no point vel, you no point
vel, be garr you be vere sicke, you no point leave a de
provision, be garr you stay, spit your nose.

LASSIN: All staies have strength like to thy arguments.

CASSIMERE: Staie Lassenbergh.

LUCILIA: Deare Lord. ... [III.1.40]

FLORES: Most honord Earle.

LASSIN: Nothing shall hinder my resolved intent,
But I will restlesse wander from the world,
Till I have shaken off these chaines from me. [Exit Lassinbergh.]

LUCILIA: And I will never cease to follow thee,
Till I have wonne thee from these unkinde thoughts. [Exit Lucilia.]

CASSIMERE: Haplesse Lucilia.

FLORES: Unkinde Lassinbergh.

DOCTOR: Be garr, dis Earle be de chollericke complection;
almost skipshack, be garr: he no point staie for one place. ... [III.1.50]
Madam me be no so laxative: mee be bound for no point
moove. sixe, seven, five hundra yeare, from you sweete
sidea: be garr me be es de fine Curianet about your vite
neck: my harte be close tie to you as your fine Buske, or
de fine Gartra bout your fine legge.

HAUNCE: A good sensible Doctor. how feelinglie he talkes.

DOCTOR: A plage a de Marshan, blowe wine.

HAUNCE: You need not curse him sir, he has the stormes
at Sea by this time.

DOCTOR: O forte bien, a good Sea-sick jeast, by this faire ... [I.1.60]
hand: blowe winde for mee: puh he no come heere Madame.

FLORES: Come noble Earle, let your kind presence grace
Our feast prepard, for this obdurate Lord,
And give some comfort to his sorrowfull bride,
Who in her pitteous teares swims after him.

DOCTOR: Me beare you company, signior Flores.

FLORES: It shall not need sir.

DOCTOR: Be garr dis be de sweete haven for me for anchor.

FLORES: You are a sweet smell-feast, Doctor that I see,
Ile no such tub-hunters use my house: ... [III.1.70]
Therefore be gone our marriage feast is dasht.

DOCTOR: Vat speak a me de feast: me spurne a me kick a
De feast, be garr me tell a,
Me do de grand grace, de favor, for suppa, for dina,
For eata with dee, be garrs blur,
We have at home de restorative de quintessence,
De pure destill goulde, de Nector
De Ambrosia, Zacharee, make ready de fine
Partriche depaste de grand Otamon?

HAUNCE: Zachary is not heere sir, but Ile do it for you: ... [III.1.80]
What is that Otamon, sir?

DOCTOR: O, de grand Bayaret de Mahomet,
De grand Turgur be garr.

HAUNCE: O a Turkie, sir, you would have rosted would you?
Call you him an Otamon?

DOCTOR: Have de whole ayre of Fowle at commaund.

FLORES: You have the foole at command sir,
You might have bestowed your selfe better:
Wilt please you walke M. Doct. Dodypoll.
[Exeunt all but the Doctor.]

DOCTOR: How Doddie poole? garrs blurr, ... [III.1.90]
Doctor Doddie, no point poole,
You be paltrie Jack knave by garr
De Doctor is nicast, the Doctor is rage,
De Doctor is furie be gar. the Doctor is
Horrible, terrible furie: Vell derre
Be a ting me tinke, be gars blur me know,
Me be revenge, me tella de Duke,
Vell me say no more: choke a de selfe foule churle,
Fowle horrible, terrible pigge pye cod. [Exit.]

Scene III.2
[Enter Leander and Hyanthe.]

LEANDER: I wonder what variety of sights,
Retaines your father, and the prince so long
With signior Flores?

HYANTHE: O signior Flores, is a man so ample
In every complement of entertainement,
That guests with him, are as in Bowers enchanted,
Reft of all power, and thought of their returne?
[Enter the Duke and Hardenbergh.]

LEANDER: Be silent, heere's the Duke.

ALPHONSO: Aye me, beholde,
Your sonne Lord Hardenbergh, ... [III.2.10]
Courting Hyanthe.

HARDEN: If he be courting: tis for you my liege.

ALPHONSO: No Hardenbergh; he loves my sonne too well,
To be my spokes man in the rights of love.
My faire Hyanthe, what discourse is it
Wherewith Leander holdes you this attentive?
Would I could thinke upon the like for you.

HYANTHE: You should but speake, & passe the time my lord.

ALPHONSO: Passe-time that pleaseth you: is the use of time,
Had I the ordering of his winged wheele, ... [III.2.20]
It onely should serve your desires and mine,
What should it do, if you did governe it?

HYANTHE: It should go backe againe, and make you yong.

ALPHONSO: Swounds Hardenbergh.
: ~~~ To her againe my Lord.

ALPHONSO: Hyanthe, wouldst thou love me, I would use thee
So kindlie, that nothing should take thee from me.

HYANTHE: But time would soone take you from me my lord.

ALPHONSO: Spite on my soule: why talke I more of time?
Shee's too good for me at time, by heaven.

HARDEN: I and place too (my Lord) I warrant her. ... [III.2.30]

OMNES: Stop, stop, stop.
[Enter Albeydure mad, Motto, and others following him.]

MOTTO: O stay my Lord.

ALBERDURE: Hyanthe, Hyanthe, O me my love.

LEANDER: Heer's the Duke his father, heele marr all.

ALBERDURE: O villaine, he that lockt her in his arms,
And through the river swims along with her,
Stay traiterous Nessus, give me bowe and shafts.
Whirre, I have strooke him under the shorte ribs,
I come Hyanthe, O peace, weepe no more. [Exit.]

ALPHONSO: Meanes he not me by Nessus, Hardenbergh? ... [III.2.40]

HARDEN: My lord he is surelie mad.
: ~~~ Hyanthe loves him.
See how she trembles, and how pale she lookes,
She hath enchanted my deere Alderbure,
With crafts and treasons, and most villanous Arts,
Are meanes by which she seekes to murder him,
Hardenbergh, take her, and imprison her,
Within thy house, I will not loose my sonne,
For all the wealth, the Loves of heaven embrace.

HYANTHE: What meanes your grace by this?

ALPHONSO: Away with her. ... [III.2.50]

HYANTHE: You offer me intollerable wrong.

ALPHONSO: Away with her I say.

HARDEN: Come Lady feare not, Ile entreate you well.

HYANTHE: What injurie is this. [Exit Hardenbergh with Hyanthe.]

ALPHONSO: So now I have obtainde what I desired,
And I shall easilie worke her to my will,
For she is in the hands of Hardenbergh,
Who will continually be pleading for me. [Enter Doctor.]

DOCTOR: Roome, a hall, a hall, be garr vere is de Duke?

ALPHONSO: Heere maister Doctor. ... [III.2.60]

DOCTOR: O me have grand important matter for tella
your grace, how de know de cause, for de wish cause
your sonne is da madman. [Enter Alberdure running.]

ALBERDURE: What art thou here?
Sweet Clio: come, be brief,
Take me thy Timbrell and Tobaccho pipe,
And give Hyanthe musicke at her windowe.

DOCTOR: Garrs blurr, my cap, my cap, cost me de deale
a French crowne.

ALBERDURE: But Ile crowne thee, with a cod of Muske, ... [III.2.70]
Insteed of Lawrell, and a Pomander:
But thou must write Acrostignes first my girle.

DOCTOR: Garzowne, what a pox do you stand heere for
de grand pultrone pezant: and see de Doctor be dus.

ALBERDURE: Aye me, what Demon was it gulde me thus?
This is Melpomene that Scottish witch,
Whom I will scratche like to some villanous gibb, and.

DOCTOR: O garzowne, la diabole, la pestilence, gars blur.

ALPHONSO: Lay holde upon him, helpe the Doctor there!

ALBERDURE: Then reason's fled to animals I see, ... [III.2.80]
And Ile vanish like tobaccho smoake. [Exit.]

DOCTOR: A grand pestilence a dis furie.

ALPHONSO: Follow him sirs, Leander, good Leander:
But Doctor, canst thou tell us the true cause,
Of this his suddaine frenzie?

DOCTOR: O by garr, please your grace hear de long tale
de short tale?

ALPHONSO: Briefe as you can good Doctor.

DOCTOR: Faite, and trot, briefe den, very briefe, very
laccingue, de prince your sonne, feast with de knave
Jeweller Flores, and he for make-a prince, love a de foule
croope-shouldra daughter Cornelia, give a de prince a
de love poudra which my selfe give for the wenche a,
before, and make him starke madde be garr, because he
drinke a too much a.

ALPHONSO: How know you this?

DOCTOR: Experience teach her by garr. de poudra have
grand force for enflama de bloud, too much make a de
rage and de present furie: be garr I feare de mad man
as de devilla, garr bless a. [Enter Hardenbergh.] ... [III.2.100]

ALPHONSO: How now sweete Hardenbergh?

HARDEN: The prince my Lord in going down the staires
Hath forste an Ape [Axe] from one of the Trevants,
And with it (as he runnes) makes such cleare way,
As no man dare oppose him to his furie.

ALPHONSO: Aye me, what may I do? heere are such newes to
As never could have entred our free eares,
But that their sharpnesse do enforce a passage,
Follow us Doctor; 'tis Flores trecherie
That thus hath wrought my sonnes distemperature.

HARDEN: Flores the Jeweler? [Exit (Alphonso).]

DOCTOR: I he, dat fine precious-stone knave, by garr
I tinke I shall hit upon hir skirt till be thred bare new.
[Exit (Doctor with, Hardenbergh).]

Scene III.3
[Musicke playing within. Enter a Peasant.]

PEASANT: Tis night, and good faith I am out of my way,
O harke, what brave musick is this under the green hill?
[Enter Fairies bringing in a banquet.]
O daintie, O rare, a banquet, would to Christ,
I were one of their guests. Gods ad, a fine little
Dapper fellow has spyed me: what will he doo?
He comes to make me drinke. I thanke you sir.
Some of your victuals I pray sir, nay now keepe your meate,
I have enough I; the cup I faith. [Exit.]

[Enter [t]he spirit with banqueting stuffe,& missing the Pesantup & downe for him, the rest wondring at him; tothemthe Enchanter.]

ENCHANTER: Where is my precious cup you Antique flames,
Tis thou that hast convaide it from my bowre, ... [III.3.10]
And I will binde thee in some hellish cave,
Till thou recover it againe for me.
You that are bodyes made of lightest ayre,
To let a Pesant mounted on a Jade
Coozen your curtesies, and run away
With such a Jewell: worthy are to endure,
Eternall pennance in the lake of fier.
[Enter Lassinbergh & Lucilia.]

LASSIN: Wilt thou not cease then to pursue me still,
Should I entreate thee to attend me thus,
Then thou wouldst pant and rest; then your soft feete, ... [III.3.20]
Would be repining at these niggard stones:
Now I forbid thee, thou pursuest like winde,
No tedious space of time, nor storme can tire thee,
But I will seeke out some high slipperie close,
Where every step shall reache the gate of death,
That feare may make thee cease to follow me.

LUCILIA: There will I bodilesse be, when you are there,
For love despiseth death, and scorneth feare.

LASSIN: Ile wander where some boysterous river parts
This solid continent, and swim from thee. ... [III.3.30]

LUCILIA: And there Ile follow, though I drowne for thee.

LASSIN: But I forbid thee.
: ~~~ I desire thee more.

LASSIN: Art thou so obstinate?
|: ~~ You taught me so.

LASSIN: I see thou lovest me not.
: ~~~ I know I doo.

LASSIN: Do all I bid thee then.
: ~~~ Bid then, as I may doo.

LASSIN: I bid thee leave mee.
: ~~~ That I cannot doo.

LASSIN: My hate.
: ~~~ My love.
: ~~~~~~ My torment.
: ~~~~~~~~~ My delight.

LASSIN: Why do I straine to weary thee with words?
Speech makes thee live; Ile then with silence kill thee:
Henceforth be deafe to thy words, ... [III.3.40]
And dumbe to thy minde.

ENCHANTER: What rock hath bred this savage minded man?
That such true love, in such rare beautie shines,
Long since I pittied her: pittie breeds love;
And love commaunds th'assistance of my Art,
T'enclude them in the bounds of my commaund.
Heere stay your wandring steps: clime [chime] silver strings,
Chime hollow caves; and chime, you whistling reedes;
For musick is the sweetest chime for love:
Spirits, binde him, and let me leave my love. [Exeunt.]

Scene III.4
[Enter Alberdure at one doore, and meetes with the Pesant at the other doore.]

ALBERDURE: Hyanthe. o sweet Hyanthe, have I met thee?
How is thy beautie changed since our departure!
A beard Hyanthe? o tis growne with griefe,
But now this love shall teare thy griefe from thee.

PEASANT: A pox on you: what are you?
Swounds, I thinke I am haunted with spirits.

ALBERDURE: Weepe not Hyanthe; Ile weepe for thee:
Lend me thy eyes, no, villaine thou art he
That in the top of Ervines hill:
Daunst with the Moone, and eate up all the starres, ... [III.4.10]
Which make thee like Hyanthe shine so faire,
But villaine, I will rip them out of thee. [Enter Motto and others.]

PEASANT: Slid holde your hands.

ALBERDURE: I come with thunder.

PEASANT: Come and you dare.

MOTTO: Holde villaine, tis the young prince Alberdure.

PEASANT: Let the young Prince hold then, slid, I have no starres
in my bellie, I, let him seeke his Hyanthe where he will.

ALBERDURE: O this way by the glimmering of the Sunne,
And the legierite of her sweete feete, ... [III.4.20]
Shee scowted on, and I will follow her,
I see her like a goulden spangle sit,
Upon the curled branche of yonder tree,
Sit still Hyanthe, I will flie to thee. [Exit.]

MOTTO: Follow, follow, follow.
[Exeunt all but Peasant. Enter Flores and Homer (Haunce).]

PEASANT: Together and be hanged. O
Heere comes more, pray God I have better lucke with these two.
By your leave sir, do you know one Maist. Flores I pray?

FLORES: What wouldst thou have with him?

PEASANT: Faith sir, I am directed to you by Lady Fortune ... [III.4.30]
with a piece of plate: I doe hope you will use plaine dealing,
being a Jeweller.

FLORES: Where hadst thou this?

PEASANT: In a very strange place sir.

HAUNCE: He stole it sir I warrant you.

FLORES: I never saw a Jemme so precious:
So wonderfull in substance and in Art:
Fellow confesse preciselie, where thou hadst it.

PEASANT: Faith sir, I had it in a cave in the bottome of a
fine greene hill where I found a company of Fairies, I thinke ... [III.4.40]
they call them.

FLORES: Sawst thou any more such furniture there?

PEASANT: Store sir, store.

FLORES: And canst thou bring me thither?

PEASANT: With a wet finger sir.

HAUNCE: And ha' they good cheere too?

PEASANT: Excellent.

HAUNCE: O sweete theefe.

FLORES: Tis sure some place enchanted, which this ring
Will soone dissolve, and guard me free from feare: ... [III.4.50]
Heeres for the cup; come, guide me quickly thither.
Ah, could I be possest of more such Jemmes,
I were the wealthiest Jeweller on earth. [Exeunt.]

Scene III.5
[Enter Enchanter, leading Lucilia & Lassinbergh, bound by spirits, who
being laid down on a green banck, the spirits fetch in a banquet.

The Song

Oh princely face and fayre, that lightens all the ayre,
Would God my eyes kinde fire, might life and soule inspire:
To thy riche beauty shining in my hearts treasure,
The unperfect words refining, for perfect pleasure.

ENCHANTER: Lie there, and lose the memorie of her,
Who likewise hath forgot the thought of thee
By my inchantments: come sit downe faire Nimphe
And taste the sweetnesse of these heavenly cates,
Whilst from the hollow craines of this rocke,
Musick shall sound to recreate my love. ... [III.5.10]
But tell me had you ever lover yet?

LUCILIA: I had a lover, I think, but who it was
Or where, or how long since, aye me, I know not:
Yet beat my timerous thoughts on such a thing,
I feele a passionate heate, but finde no flame:
Thinke what I know not, nor know what I thinke.

ENCHANTER: Hast thou forgot me then? I am thy love,
Whom sweetly thou wert wont to entertaine,
With lookes, with vowes of love, with amorous kisses,
Lookst thou so strange, doost thou not know me yet? ... [III.5.20]

LUCILIA: Sure I should know you.

ENCHANTER: Why, love, doubt you that?
Twas I that lead you through the painted meades,
When the light Fairies daunst upon the flowers,
Hanging on every leafe an orient pearle,
Which stroocke together with the silver winde,
Of their loose mantels, made a silver chime.
'Twas I that winding my shrill bugle horne,
Made a guilt pallace breake out of the hill,
Filled suddenly with troopes of knights and dames, ... [III.5.30]
Who daunst and reveld whilste we sweetly slept,
Upon a bed of Roses wrapt all in goulde.
Doost thou not know me yet?

LUCILIA: Yes now I know you.

ENCHANTER: Come then confirme thy knowledge with a kis.

LUCILIA: Nay stay, you are not he, how strange is this.

ENCHANTER: Thou art growne passing strange my love,
To him that made thee so long since his bride.

LUCILIA: O, was it you? come then, o stay a while,
I know not what I am, nor where I am, ... [III.5.40]
Nor you, nor these I know, nor any thing.
[Enter Flores with Haunce and the Peasant.]

PEASANT: This is the greene Sir where I had the Cup,
And this the bottome of a falling hill,
This way I went following the sound:
And see.

HAUNCE: O see, and seeing eate withall.

FLORES: What Lassinbergh laid bound, and fond Lucilia
Wantonly feasting by a strangers side,
Peasant be gone, Haunce, stand you there and stir not,
Now sparckle forth thy beams, thou vertuous Jemme, ... [III.5.50]
And lose these strong enchauntments.

ENCHANTER: Stay, aye me:
We are betrai'd, haste spirits and remove
This table and these cups remove I say,
Our incantations strangely are dissolv'd.
[Exeunt Enchanter, with spirits and banquets.]

HAUNCE: O spiteful churles, have they caried away all?
has haste made no waste?

LUCILIA: My Lord Earle Lassinbergh, o pardon me.

LASSIN: Away from me.

LUCILIA: O can I in these bands, forget the ... [III.5.60]
Dutie of my love to you? were they
Of Iron, or strong Adamant, my hands
Should teare them from my wronged Lord.

FLORES: O Lassinbergh, to what undoubted perrill,
Of life and honour had you brought your selfe,
By obstinacie of your froward minde?
Had not my fortune brought me to this place,
To lose the enchantment, which enthralled you both,
By hidden vertue of this precious ring.
Come therefore friendly, and imbrace at last ... [III.5.70]
The living partner of your strange mishaps,
Justly pursuing you for flying her.

LASSIN: Leave me I say, I can endure no more.

LUCILIA: Ah, have I loos'd thee then, to flie from mee?

LASSIN: Away. [Exit]
: ~~~ Ile follow thee.
: ~~~~~~Tarrie Lucilia.

LUCILIA: Deare father pardon mee.

FLORES: Sirah, attend her poore wretch,
I feare this too much love in thee, is fatall to thee:
Up, sirrah, follow your mistresse.

HAUNCE: I sir, I go, my mistresse dogs the banket, ... [III.5.80]
And I dog her. [Exeunt.]


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